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01.22.01 Chapter Four Added. 01.21.01 Chapter Three Added. 01.21.01 Errors fixed in Chapters 1-2 01.20.01 Rydia Fiction Project Dropped |
Snizz Fiction
The story of Earth's Last Days
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:: Unsafe Ideas ::
The Story of the Planet's Last Days ___________________________________ ~* This story was writen without a purpose. This story was written out of boredom. This story is 100% hazardous to your health. And remember: Contrary to popular belief, I was NOT hopped up on Tylonol when I wrote it. *~ ___________________________________ Prologue: Stuff. And stuff. *~* Vice Assistant Pig Farmer Chickencha sat in the corner. *~* Meanwhile, Hemidemisemi-God Rirse plotted. Why did he plot? Because, quite frankly, he had nothing better to do. Or, well, aside from turning on the smutty channels on his TV, but he didn't feel like that, today. At a loss for ideas, the sinister Hemidemisemi-God did what any self-respecting business man would do. He paged his secretary. Kawaii Ryuukishi, a shapely secretary, waltzed in his door cheerfully. "You, like, rang?" he asked in a horridly valley girl tone. Rirse looked offended. "Oh! Uh.. *cough* 'What wrong, sir?' *cough*" Kawaii hastilly corrected himself. "I no can think of idea." Rirse demanded. "And you think I have some? I'm just a dumb brunette. *Tee-hee*" Kawaii replied. "Damn." Rirse said simply. "Go away before I turn you in Dr. Forrester." Kawaii promptly ran. Rirse hit his call button again. This time, a (more) feminine form appeared as the huge double doors to Rirse's office opened. Moving into the light, the perfectly proportioned body of Rydia of Mist became visible. "How may I help you, sir Rirse?" Rydia asked in an official tone. "I need evil idea." Rirse sobbed. "Easy. Eat carrots." she told him plainly. "Ok." he replied, not doubting her. She gave a sharp salute, and turned to leave. *~* Vice Assistant Pig Farmer Chickencha still sat in the corner. *~* Laboratory Assistant Hamee was a good little boy. He ate all his vegetables, and brushed thrice a day. He could count by twos, and tie his shoes. And he could dance a mean salsa. But today, that didn't matter. Today was the day he would shine. Today, a day which would live in infamy, was his day to push the "Power On" button. Walking confidently to the podium, he took a deep breath, collecting himself as his hundreds of peers looked on supportively. Cheers rang out through the crowd. Reaching out, Germ Hamee slapped that button good. The customary whirring and clicking did not occur. The usual humming did not initiate. The techies looked around in disbelief. Had Hamee messed up? Impossible. Germ stood at the podium, looking around. An expression of pure beweilderment crossed his face. Then the place blew up. Spewing nuclear ichy stuff all over everywhere, the cloud looked rather like Pat Buchanan on one of his good days. *~* Del Snizz was a dull little boy. He sat surrounded in reference books, and military strategy guides. One day, he'd rule the world. His mommy had told him so. *~* Preview of Chapter One: "I really don't think holding the Queen Mother for ransom is an effective idea, Rirse." "Boogers are cooler than yoop." "It's not my fault that people inexplicably erupt in flame when I'm around. *shrug*" |